A speaker addresses participants at a Life-Giving Wounds retreat in Washington, D.C., in this undated photo. COURTESY OF LIFE-GIVING WOUNDS
‘A community of people who have been through what I’ve been through’
Life-Giving Wounds retreat for adult children of divorce/separation to be offered in March
BY ELIZABETH WONG BARNSTEAD, THE WESTERN KENTUCKY CATHOLIC
For people who not only witnessed their parents’ divorce, but were also “caught up as collateral damage,” the Life-Giving Wounds retreat provides a space to explore their own experiences, according to a participant at the retreat.
“The reality is that children, no matter what age, are not meant to see their parents’ marriage end,” said this participant, who attended the August 2022 retreat – the first of its kind sponsored by the Diocese of Owensboro and the Diocese of Evansville. The participant asked to remain anonymous in sharing their testimony with The Western Kentucky Catholic.
Life-Giving Wounds is a ministry dedicated specifically to adults whose parents are divorced or separated.
The retreat, which is offered around the United States, “acknowledges the wounds caused by divorce and proclaims the truth about marriage, divorce, and how to bring our wounds to Christ,” said the participant, who appreciated the “time and space with peers who had also experienced a parents’ divorce.”
On March 14-16, 2025, the Owensboro and Evansville dioceses will again collaborate to offer a third Life-Giving Wounds Retreat for the region. More information, including how to register, may be found at owensborodiocese.org/life-giving-wounds.
Participants attend a Life-Giving Wounds retreat in Washington, D.C., in this undated photo. COURTESY OF LIFE-GIVING WOUNDS
Mike Flaherty, a retired Catholic psychologist based in Owensboro, serves as a counselor for these local retreats. He explained that the retreats are not therapy, but that “sometimes the retreat can become intensely emotional, so a participant may need a little extra support.”
“Early in my career and working with children primarily, and with my wife working in education, recognized a cause-and-effect of potential emotional and psychological problems in children whose parents have divorced, especially if it was a contentious divorce,” said Flaherty.
When he learned about Life-Giving Wounds and saw how it was set up “to address spiritual healing for adult Catholics,” Flaherty was further impressed that the program “utilized and incorporated the research on children of divorce and the effects it had on them.”
This twofold approach created “an incredible, robust retreat,” he said. Plus, “it’s very lowkey and accepting” and the team is “an accepting, understanding, caring group. Your comfort level is always taken into consideration.”
Charlie Hardesty, a past retreat participant, said the Life-Giving Wounds retreat was “a great experience to be with a community of people who have been through what I’ve been through and understand.”
“I highly encourage anyone to consider this retreat whether you were a child when your parents got divorced or if you were an adult like I was,” he said, adding that Life-Giving Wounds provides “an opportunity to heal, to encounter the Lord, and to grow in your faith in a deeper way.”
Flaherty agreed.
“I believe this retreat is a pathway to healing, and I hope people take advantage of it,” he said.
Originally printed in the January 2025 issue of The Western Kentucky Catholic.
